The First Time & The Last Time...

Alright blogosphere, hold on to your aprons, this could get messy.

I'm going to talk about "race". Not the intellectualized, buttered up and broadcasted view of race, but race from my perspective and life experience.

Let me preface this by saying that this post was brought on by a wildly offensive text I received a couple of days ago questioning the reasoning behind my delving into my past on Ancestry.com. I have since forgiven this person but my patience has been reached and the damage has been done.

However, just to make sure we're getting everything, let's start at the beginning.

I am of mixed heritage. My father is African-American and my mother is Puerto Rican. I identify as a Puerto Rican man. Not black. I love my father and he loves me. He knows that I identify as Puerto Rican and is fine with it. In fact, he encourages it.

All my life I have dreaded the question, "So, what are you?" knowing that they were implying, "What race are you?"
All my life I have felt the overwhelming need to correct people when they call me "black" or the need to explain myself when I call myself Puerto Rican. Yes, when people ask what race I am, I tell them "Puerto Rican." I put it on every legal document. Job application. Even those dumb Facebook surveys.
I do this not because I'm denying a part of myself.
Not because I don't want to be black but because that's how I was raised. My parents collectively raised me to identify with the Latino heritage and I made the conscious choice to identify as Latino when I got older. Being Puerto Rican is all I know.

Ironically, the subject of my heritage has gotten worse as I've gotten older. Some people (yes, that's plural) have even had the nerve to correct me when I told them I was Puerto Rican.

What?!?

When did it become acceptable in American society to question someone when they tell another person their heritage? Let me be very clear, no one has the right to question my own heritage. The fact that someone would even try and correct me is asinine and illogical. Who gave anyone the right to plaster a label on me and file me with a select few people they know? I refuse to just take a number and join the rest of the people you've color categorized in your own mind.

My favourite is, "why do you dress so white?"

Oh that one just kills me for many reasons. One, you are implying that because my skin is darker that I should dress a specific way. Two, you are implying that I shouldn't be wearing the clothes I'm wearing. Three, you are have openly revealed that in your head, there are groups of people and these people wear certain things, say certain things and do certain things. Also, that because I do not fit your set notion of people, that I am wrong.

Isn't that grand? And people wonder why I don't like people...

Let's get one thing straight: the fact that I don't fit into someone's narrow, uncultured view of the world is thrilling. It means that I'm doing something right :)

Now let me clarify, I'm not writing this on my blog because I desire attention or to start something up. I am writing this as the first and the last. This is the first time I have openly addressed race (more specifically my heritage) and will be the last time.

I refuse to explain myself any longer and I refuse to answer the question, "so what are you?" because it is irrelevant.
Is knowing my heritage going to make you want to talk to me more/less?
Is knowing my heritage going to reveal a great mystery?
Is knowing my heritage going to make you want to get to know me more/less?
Is knowing my heritage going to make me more/less attractive?

If the answer is "no" to any of those questions then stop asking, "so what are you?" You might actually be on the road to being one of the few decent people in this country.
If your answer is "yes" to any of those questions then you really need to take a hard look at the way you view people.

As for me?

I am not a label.

Go color code someone else.

Till Next Time...

Where I Am...

Lately I've been trying to measure where I am.

Not like my physical location, but my state of being.

There has been quite a lot of changes that have happened over the past couple of months and it's in these moments that I like to try and make sure I'm keeping track of everything.

All things considered, I'm in a good place! I haven't been overtly stressed, school is manageable, work is work and my family is in a good place.

For the first time in quite a while, I'm genuinely happy. It's weird to say because many times I feel like things are just whirling about me but I'm at peace. I truly believe that this is God's handiwork. Only God could have given me such peace and this all stems from trusting Him. Like I've said a billion times, I've been training myself to keep remembering that God is sovereign. Anything He does is for my good and in trusting that, I will have peace!

This is probably the first time in my entire life that I've actually begun to truly trust God that He will take care of me and not just say it. I think it started with my decision to jump aboard the LifeCity train actually. That kind of move was the catalyst that got me off my rear and start walking in the faith I say I possess. I expected it to be hard and it was at first. But God, in His mercy, has given me such a peace. I'm just going to enjoy this while I can and allow it to strengthen me to continue to trust God in everything.

On another note, Easter is approaching quickly! I'm not exaggerating when I say it snuck up on me. It really did and I feel so unprepared lol However, I'm excited to go through this weekend keeping in mind Christ's sacrifice that allowed me and billions of people to have life beyond the carnal. He defeated death by dying and paved the way to eternal life through Him! I think that's cause for epic celebration ;) Speaking of celebrating, I'm excited to be with my LifeCity family for our first Easter together! It's going to be wonderful, refreshing and countless other dazzling adjectives :) I'll be praying that you keep your thoughts on Christ and rejoice with the Church! "Christ is risen from the dead, we are one with Him again..."

Oh! Before I forget, I've been listening to Christy Nockels' new album "Into the Glorious" practically non-stop since it was released. It's so worshipful. You can tell that these are her prayers to the Lord and not just songs for an album. She has meditated on these, it has taken root in her and it's reflected in the passion she has in her voice. SO amazing. Goodness gracious. God bless Christy Nockels and her brilliant musical prowess. haha! So if you want to get saved all over again, I recommend downloading it. It's like 10 buckaroos. Not a lot at all.

If you don't get it, I'll just assume you don't want to be saved or you don't love Jesus... :P haha!

Till Next Time...

P.S. How do you like the new layout? Cool huh? :)

Say/Do

Last week, LifeCity started meeting during the week as a missional community. Now, if you don't know what missional community is all about, essentially it is a group of about 15 to 20 people who gather for the specific purpose to grow in their walk with Christ and to reach out to people in their communities. It's really beautiful and worth a look-see. (*SEE BOTTOM!*) Anyways, we talked about the church and what it means to "be the church" and not "go to church". There is this idea that people "go to church" which is actually incorrect theology. We are the church. Everywhere we go, we are the church.

This got me thinking about the church, the mission of the church, our responsibility as the church and a bunch of other things. I was super quiet in our meeting simply because I was processing through all this information and drawing connections and getting a better understanding. But now I'm ready to talk! Now, to preface, I'm not a Bible scholar (surprise!). I'm simply seeing and responding to what I see.

I feel like the church as a whole is kind of going through a bit of reform of sorts. We've gotten so accustomed to saying, "we're going to church guys!" that we've kind of lost track of what we're actually doing. Some of us know that we're saying, "we are the church, we're just going to a building" but, thankfully, people don't know what we are thinking! We, as the church, cannot continue to go around saying, "we're going to church" simply because people who are not in the church begin to foster an incorrect ideology that the church is a building and not a body of people. They are, in essence, being deceived and therefore changing any type of idea they had about the church. We, as the church, need to say what we mean and not just expect people to just know. This extends all ways of life but this is most essential in the church. I feel like the church as a whole is needing to backpedal and say, "hey, we're sorry for saying this. We actually meant to say this," to billions of people. And if you think we don't, just ask someone what they think about the church. Chances are that you're not going to get nice answers and the word that might surface is the word hypocrisy because the church is saying one thing and doing another.

This change of thought is what is going to revive the church. Saying that, "we are the church" is a manner of ownership. We are taking responsibility over our faith and challenging ourselves in the process to be the face of the church because, I mean, we are. Every where we go. Everyone we talk to. We are direct representations of the church as a whole whether it is fair or not. People who have no idea of the church are watching what you do at every moment and they will judge the church as a whole based on what you do. Yes, that is a great burden to bear but what a beautiful burden it is! Jesus, by calling you to be apart of His family, is essentially saying, "I trust you to represent my church everywhere you go. I have confidence in you to carry My Name well."

I get chills when I think about that.


This is what it means to be an ambassador for Christ. And as ambassadors, we have a responsibility that if we see a need, we shouldn't need to send them to a pastor or an elder, we should gladly move forward and help fulfill the need. This reminds me when the disciples sent the sick to Jesus not realizing that the same power that rested in Christ also rested within them.

Can you imagine if they came to that realization? Imagine the impact.

Now apply that to today.

Do you see?

I think people are actually kind of terrified by saying, "we are the church" otherwise we would jump to the opportunity to say it. By saying, "I am the church" we're are slapping a spotlight on our lives and suddenly everything counts. Our lives suddenly have a standard to live up to and people are afraid to embark on that. And I'm no exception! I think it's terrifying to think that my life as a whole is a direct representation of how people perceive the church. But I mean, that's small compared to the fact that Christ gave His entire life for us. The very least He is requiring of us is to live right and reflect His transformation in our lives. I mean, really...

Goodness, the more I think about the church and our role in the world and our responsibility the more I come to more realizations of Jesus' view of the church. It's a beautiful think to think about.

So that's my two-cents! I would love to hear what people think about this subject.

Till Next Time...

**If you wanted to know more about missional community, there's an awesome video that I was shown that shows it in action. It's about 15 minutes long but it's worth every bit of your time. Missional Community