The Roundabout

I think I've got it now!

Okay so earlier this month (or maybe it was last month?) I finally realized where I wanted to be. And it wasn't the place I expected to be but somehow I always knew it was where I would end up. I shall explain and cease being cryptic.

In my college small group a while ago we were talking about what we wanted to be as kids and what we want to be now. The latter question always freak me out. Don't ask me why. I'm just weird.
Peoples' "kid" answers varied from astronaut to elephant and their "now" answers varied from still deciding to travelling the globe.
Anyways, it came to be my turn. "When I was a kid I wanted to be a scientist, then wanted to be an astronomer. That didn't last long. Then I wanted to be psychologist."

I could already feel the pressure as I got closer to the question that has been haunting simmering in me for the longest time. "What do you want to do now?"

I just opened my mouth and said the first thing that came in my head.
It wasn't a scientist, for that required me to know things I was not good at.
It wasn't an astronomer because I mean really...
It wasn't a psychologist, for I found out I wouldn't legally see my first patient till I was 30 and it turns out that I don't have as much patience for people's problems as I originally thought...
And it wasn't even music even though I love playing music and will probably continue throughout my life.

"I want to be a journalist. I want to write and travel the world."

Well that was easy.

But in was literally in that moment that everything just kind of fell into place. I've been writing since I was little and it has been one of the most constant things in my life. I never really thought that I could do this as a career because to me it was fun! It came naturally to me and it was, and still is, the best way that I communicate to people. It makes sense!

And it turns out that 2 of my very best friends are going to be studying that same field so how cool is that?! I want to say that God gave me such a grand revelation but really, He gave me that passion to me a long time ago. It just took over 10 years to realize it. Haha! How crazy is that? That God gives us things and takes us on the roundabout way only to bring us to the place where we can tell ourselves that this is what we want and what we've always wanted. That's God's perfect timing once again because I would have never admitted to myself that I wanted to be a journalist a year ago or even 2 years ago. But all it took was one person saying, "you're good at this. You should look into moving forward with writing" for me to begin to mull it over and then for my college group leader to ask that question that scared me for so long.

So! After all of this, I have taken the steps towards journalism knowing that God's got this. I have submitted my application to Wake Tech for the spring semester in their transfer program. (NEVER thought that would happen...) I'm still in the process of admission but after that is over I will be taking online classes (thanks Shelbs for piquing me to that information :)). After I finish the transfer program I will transfer my credits to UNC for their journalism degree! Just writing that makes me smile! :D

Please continue to pray for me. Pray that I don't lose sight of God in the midst of all this paperwork and that I always remember that God's got this! Thanks!

Till Next Time...

One Word...

Love.

This word and its meaning has been brewing in me for a week now.

Let me first back up and explain.

On Monday at my church's college group, our college pastor spoke on love and the Hebrew words for love. Now I had always heard about the Greek words for love ( agape, eros and philia) but no one has ever spoken about the Hebrew words.

Anyways, the Hebrew words for love are Raw-Aw - which is like the root of love; where all love stems from; when you can truly see a person in all their crap and still love them.

A-Hab-Ba - which is a deep affection; like "there's no other place I would rather be than with you" kind of love

And then there is Dode - which is the "mingling of souls". There's really no other way to describe it other than that.

I found these words fascinating 1. because I had never been taught them and 2. because they were all so deep. There wasn't a love that was just flippant. All the words had a commitment. They required a fair amount of sacrifice to use.

It really got me thinking about how I use the word 'love'. I've become so flippant with my usage that its become trivial. At least to other people it will sound trivial. I mean, what if I were talking about my favorite band (which is The Reign of Kindo right now. Fun Steven fact for ya) and about how much I love them and then turned to my best friends and say I love them too. I most certainly don't love my friends like I love The Reign of Kindo and they know that but still! They would never know the true value in that word when I use it.

A lot of us at this point would start to say, "I wish there was another word of love so we could differentiate". Which I totally agree with but we have to be realistic. We cannot change the English language. That's ridiculous. So because we cannot change the word for love in English our only alternative is to be cautious. We need to be mindful of what we say and how we say it.
We have one word for love.
It needs to count for something more.

Furthermore, in 1 John 4:8 it says "...whoever does not love, does not know God because God is Love..." So not only is the word love more than how we use it for everyday things, it's actually a descriptor of God Himself. In my head, that makes it even more sacred. And it kind of convicts me because if our Holy God chose that word to describe Himself then the last thing I should be doing is throwing it around every which way.

All in all, I felt like I needed to share that simply because it's been weighing on me and challenging me in how I convey my feelings. I don't want my words to mean nothing. When I speak there ought to be impact.

I hope this challenges anyone who is reading this on the interwebs to be careful what you say and how you say it and what your words actual mean when you say them. When you speak, it shouldn't be "a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal" it should strike to the heart and cause change. Our words are powerful, let's not take them for granted. Remember that God spoke the world in existence using words; "the Word was with God and the Word was God" and that the Word resides inside of us. With this knowledge, just imagine what our words can create in people's hearts and minds.

Till Next Time...