Wait-listed...

Oh man.

I feel like I have said that every day for the past couple of weeks. But it's so fitting!

Today I registered for my classes at WakeTech...albeit 2 classes but still, it's a start.

It's kind of surreal that after all the drama that I've gone through (and still going through btw. We'll get to that later) with schools that I'm finally stepping forward and getting more education. I know a lot of people aren't a big fan of that but that's why I always recommend waiting a while after you get out of high school to decide if this is really the path you want to take. I mean it's a really big step; don't take it lightly.

Anyways, yeah it's weird. I'm taking a Political Science class (SO WEIRD) and a General Psychology class. All, and I literally mean all, of the classes I was planning to take are either closed or waitlisted (including my English class which makes me sad...so sad). So better luck next semester I guess haha!

Oh! Back to the drama that is happening with my school.

So...

Anyone who has dealt with any section of the government knows that it is a pain in the ass to get anything done. There are enough forms with random numbers to drown you or make you want to give up halfway through. I am of course talking about Financial Aid! Yay.

I filled out my X900TYJSJD forms and sent them promptly through priority mail to the school about a month ago only to get an email from the school at the beginning of the month stating that I needed to fill them out AGAIN! How freaking fun is that, guys? And the kicker is that I got this email on the 2nd of November. The due date was on the 1st of November. Imagine my blind rage as I send strongly worded emails oddly devoid of obscenities to the Financial Aid office. It wasn't pretty.

In all of this, I was led right back to trusting God for things completely out of my hands and we all know how I love being in this position. But I have to admit that this time was harder than the others simply because I had said the same thing to God when I was dealing with Berklee. All of these old feelings of doubt and discouragement rose up and left me in a stupor for a couple days. It was only when I said, "screw it all. I can't control this so I'm just going to give this up. I don't need it despite what my head says" that I finally was allowed to be happy! I'm not saying it was easy at all but the older I get and the more experience I get, the more I find myself in situations causing me to trust God again. And He has worked it out as far as I am concerned. If I recall, all the classes I wanted to take are waitlisted and I'm only taking 2 which means less money I have to shuffle out!

Isn't God grand? I'm so glad that He's got my back even when I'm stupid :)

Till Next Time...

I'm Not A Theologian But...

Well this is an interesting thought/question and maybe I can get some feedback from my readers?

I was talking to one of my good friends like literally 20 minutes ago just about life and the reality of it. And I brought up the question: Where do we draw the line between being complacent and ungrateful?

I've actually wondered this for a long time because I've made it no secret that I have no desire to live where I'm living anymore. My heart is in Europe, a place I have never lain eyes on but feel so drawn to. But when do I stop and say, "Whoa. Let's stop here. I'm beginning to be ungrateful."

I hear all the time that we should be happy where we are in life. But I refuse to be complacent. I will not, I repeat, will not be satisfied by staying in one place for the rest of my life. I can feel it right now and it is as strong now as it was years ago. In fact, I'm feeling it stronger. Like my head is bouncing against the ceiling.

I think that being ungrateful would mean that I was taking advantage of everything and everyone around me which I'm most certainly not doing.
But what is wrong with wanting something more?
Something better?
Something new?
Is that too much to ask?
And how would one go about leaving everything and everyone they know to pursue a life that is unclear. Where is the line between faith and foolishness?

Faith is clearly stated in Hebrews 1:1-3 (ESV) "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. For by it the people of old received their commendation. By faith we understand that the universe was created by the Word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible..."
See? And weren't those champions of faith seen as foolish carrying out things that they were complete unsure of? I believe it's merely a manner of perception. The world will see is as foolhardiness but a Christian should be able to look at it and see faith at work. But I feel like there are a lot of Christians who will look at me and see a foolish boy hoping for many things and ungrateful.

A part of me wants to say "Screw you" but there's another part of me is wary of my decisions...I don't know. I feel like I start blogs with a thought and it carries into a rant. But who cares. It's my blog. I do what I wants! Haha!
But let me know what you think in the comments. I never ask for comments but I'm interested to hear what other points of view there are. If I don't see comments, I will assume that all my readers agree with me completely. :)

Till Next Time...